Despite warnings from the older generation, young steampunks have laid out plans to engage in debauched revelry this Christmas, it’s been confirmed. Christmas is traditionally a time for family, giving and receiving of presents and helping those less fortunate than ourselves. Yet the youngsters of today are snubbing tradition and getting fizzed up on the pop before making complete and utter fools of themselves. In a rebellious twist, young steampunks have explained how they’re going to make 2015 the decade’s craziest year yet.
Speaking exclusively to Steampunk Journal, one young steampunk named Timothy Herringbone told me “This year is going to be awfully loud,” he said. “Come Christmas Eve, I will take my new girlfriend Matilda out into town for a browse over the Christmas market stalls. We fully intend to take advantage of the alcohol available and will be imbibing a glass of two of sherry. Once we’ve loosened up, we will go for a gentle stroll through the park before stopping off for some Hot Chestnuts at a local vendor. After some passive aggressive attempts at stealing a kiss under some conveniently placed mistletoe, it will be back to the house for Eggnog and singing carols which could keep us up at late as 10pm!”
Other enamoured young gentlemen and ladies have suggested staying out ice skating in the park until 8pm before going back inside for a hot bath and a rub down with a big warm towel. One young lady even confessed that she has every intention of wrapping her Christmas presents on Christmas Eve and to blazes with the consequences!