New birth control for men revealed

frankensteins-lab-1931alien_skin_exposure_x_cinemaA new birth control device for men has been unveiled by Franken Industries today. In a press tour at his facility, CEO Dr Victor Stein announced the device which is as simple as flipping a switch.“Birth control is a question of class. Upper class families are generally more reserved and only have one or two children, whereas working class families tend to have larger families because they have a higher mortality rate and there’s less for them to do in the day” said Dr Stein. The press were shown around the laboratory by his assistant before we got a display of the device. It’s relatively small, no bigger than three carriages end to end. Worktops surrounding it were laden with glass vials and newly invented Bunsen Burners while the device crackled with electricity from the myriad of Jacob’s Ladders aligning the roof.

We had the opportunity to witness a dry test run (for lack of a better description) while there. A journalist from The Daily Tattle was laid on the granite table and was fitted with the cranial syringe. We asked why the syringe was located in the head when the device was to control areas lower down. “The need for control is not in the reproductive organs, but in the far, dark recesses… of the mind….” Dr Stein replied. As he trailed off the last word, he waved his hands around his head and stepped back into a shadow.

We were beckoned into an adjoining room for the display and while the dials glowed and the cathodes burned, we were assured this wasn’t an actual procedure and that Mr Rankbottom from The Tattle would be safe. We placed the dark lens goggles over our eyes as requested by the assistant – Ivor, I think his name was – and watched as the blinding electricity screamed over Mr Rankbottom’s body. A few seconds later and the test was over, the light faded and we were led into a ballroom for drinks. As we left, we saw Mr Rankbottom heading into the lift towards the bedrooms. Dr Stein assured us that he simply had a headache from the lights. And that was tired, which is why he was on a trolley.

The new device will be fully operational by the end of the month and Franken Industries are allowing the first 50 applicants a session for free, please enquire at Franken Industries or at the Steampunk Journal for more information.

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